The Top Ten Reasons to Vote for David Duke

• 10. White hoods to premiere at this year's Paris spring shows.

• 9. To help preserve the purity of the Aryan race.

• 8. Festive race riots.

• 7. For a kinder, Gentile nation.

• 6. Government-sponsored cross burnings on national holidays.

• 5. It's alliterative.

• 4. One step closer to being elected Führer^H^H^H^H^H^HPresident.

• 3. Three-fifths vote for all eligible minorities.

• 2. Now is the winter of our discontent, made glorious summer by this son of Pork.

  And the number one reason to vote for David Duke...

• What better way to prove your need for a lobotomy?